Taking a page from Ariana Grande’s Positions catalogue (complete with the game of Twister Ari was a fool not to wield in her visuals), Billie Eilish has given us a new single and video for “Lost Cause” (not to be confused with Beck’s song of the same name). On the heels of “Your Power,” this slightly “faster”-paced song rips its visuals off not from Britney Spears’ “I’m Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman,” but instead Grande’s “34+35 Remix” video (which itself has its own nod to Britney’s premise in “Slumber Party”). It also seems more than somewhat notable that the second Eilish goes blonde (in a capacity that is her Brand™ the same way her black hair with green roots was), she’s suddenly Miss Popularity with a shit ton of friends, whereas, in all of her previous videos, she appeared categorically alone. Ah, but such is the way of shedding “angst-ridden” teen years in favor of segueing into more “adult” Ariana territory (even if, the older you get, the less likely you are to be able to wrangle a “posse” together).
Perhaps more interpretable as being sapphic than what Ari, Doja and Thee Stallion did for “34+35 Remix,” Eilish is ticking all of the post-#MeToo, post-racial reckoning boxes with her casting choices for this particular “narrative.” The word, darling, is “inclusivity.” Which is perhaps why it looks like a fucking Skims ad. And, oh yeah, Eilish is wearing Skims seemingly to drive that point home (yes, Kim K was all too quick to call out that Eilish was sporting her brand). What’s more, with the lesbianic “nods” throughout, the queer community has been even quicker to want to make Eilish theirs than they were when they insisted Taylor Swift’s “betty” from folklore was a lez/bisexual-tinged song (it wasn’t). This time around, the assumption feels more ironclad, with sensual looks cast and bodies intertwined that make it impossible not to assume that Billie might make her own Miley declaration soon enough and announce her pansexuality (“It’s the person, not the gender” and all that rot).
What perhaps heightens the carnality of the entire video is the snack scene being deliberately on blast, complete with the Lays, Pringles and Cap’n Crunch (among other high-calorie sundries). And are there any greater epicurean delights than food and sex—especially when combined? Even better, there’s no body shaming up in this bitch, which is perhaps what differentiates Eilish’s slumber party the most from Ariana’s scantily clad, “Lady Marmalade”-inspired (in terms of lingerie paraded) one. These are “real” women, who’ve all been through enough bullshit from men—hence, throwing darts at a sign that just says “MEN”—to know that “putting on the ritz” in that cliché manner that connotes nothing but physical discomfiture (think: Betty Boop) isn’t worth the supposed “benefit” of “landing” a man. Especially one that Eilish is finally forced to realize isn’t on her socioeconomic level (she’s a jobist, after all).
Worse still, he doesn’t even have anything interesting to say to make it worth her while when he actually does come around. As Eilish describes it, “I used to think you were shy/Maybe you just had nothin’ on your mind/Maybe you were thinkin’ ‘bout yourself all the time.” This is where the primary critique of the male species enters into the plotline—because why put up with a lack of physical and intellectual stimulation when you could get it more easily and with far fewer mind games from the women in your life? That’s the tack Eilish seems to be taking (unless she’s just another queerbaiting pop star like Harry Styles). And plus, ever since she went full-stop shiksa with her blonde hair, apparently (and ironically), it’s brought all the multicultural clientele to the yard.
Marveling at a girl’s ass as she twerks (objectification is only okay when other women do it to each other, even if laden with the same level of grotesque male sexual yearning), perhaps Billie figures if she can’t have the only decent man on this Earth (her brother), she might as well go homo. Or maybe she’s just, once again, trying to adhere to a generational mold—being the spokesperson for one and all. Yet for someone trying her best to be “divergent,” Eilish’s anti-male rhetoric (stated while still wanting to find a dick that doesn’t piss her off) is something pulled from the baby boomer playbook (hear: Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain”). What’s more, her accusation of the bloke in question being a loser for not having a job doesn’t exactly scream “evolved perspective.” Like okay, sorry not everybody can make millions from their artistic pursuits. Another primary accusation of the chorus is, “Thought you would’ve grown eventually, but you proved me wrong (wrong)/You ain’t nothing but a lost cause (cause)/And this ain’t nothing like it once was.” Sometimes that’s just called: the end of the honeymoon period. Something every girl wishes could remain forever, only to be invariably disappointed when a guy starts scratching his balls and belching in front of her.
Yet it’s clear she rather does wish things could have worked out, as there are obvious moments when she’s railing against this man and all his wrongdoings to her crew/“orgy in a pinch” while she stands in front of them orating. Presumably talking about all the time wasted on someone she thought could be equally as “into” her, and how she refuses to waste any more of it (even though she is nineteen, and there’s still actually plenty of years left to squander). And it’s a speech that seems to have required enough hours to warrant either 1) starting the sleepover in the middle of the day or 2) continuing it from the night before.
Whatever the case, Billie herself might need a job (can’t make more money eatin’ chips all day) or some dick after this never-ending, “Island of Lesbos” sleepover. Or not… For that’s kind of the key dissenting takeaway here: while Ari and her small entourage are busy commiserating about wanting to sixty-nine with some dude that isn’t showing up to the hotel fast enough (whether a fuckboy or not), Billie and her tailored-to-reflect-inclusivity gang are all too happy to “canoodle” amongst themselves. Which might be for the best for the guy who has offended Billie (presumably Q)—because where there’s access to silly string, the idea for tee-peeing can’t be that far behind. That is, unless Billie is good and distracted by all the titties and ass surrounding her.
