Who’s A Neo Maxi Zoom Dweebie Now? Anthony Michael Hall to Face Potential Jail Time For Assault

Though Anthony Michael Hall has been kind of buff ever since 1990’s Edward Scissorhands, the masses always remember him–if they remember him at all–as that “neo maxi zoom dweebie” archetype “wailed on” by John Bender (Judd Nelson) types in John Hughes movies. And maybe this sort of perception can really …

Kristen Stewart and St. Vincent: Proof That Lesbianism Is Frequently A Straight Person’s Act of Desperation

Though Lindsay Lohan kind of blazed the trail back in 2008 with the whole straight woman randomly deciding to date another female trend, at least Samantha Ronson was already a lesbian (or bisexual, if you prefer) to begin with–making one-half of the relationship at least somewhat sensical. But in the …

Kanye West Cancels Rest of Tour Most Likely Because He Was Traumatized by Sacramento

Anyone who is not from Sacramento, who has not suffered the den of slack you experience the second from entering cannot possibly understand or empathize with what could have propelled the random tirade Kanye West went off on November 19th, the thirty-third performance of his Saint Pablo Tour since August. …

Mariah: Diva or Visionary About That $50 Million Inconvenience Fee? The Latter.

When a woman looks back on her romantic past, she’ll inevitably notice that, yes, she’s been terribly inconvenienced. Whether she moved somewhere else for the man in question (like Mariah herself) or sacrificed her needs and desires in some other way to be “accommodating,” there isn’t a female in existence …

At Last Credit Where Credit Is Due: Madonna Wins Billboard’s Woman of the Year Distinction

In an era where it’s more common than not to completely shit on Madonna (generally because of her age), it’s uncannily refreshing to learn that one of the few major entities that hasn’t turned its back on Madonna is Billboard. Though they briefly lowered their standards last year upon awarding Lady …