Jerry Seinfeld Essentially Uses “I Don’t Know Her” Defense About that Kesha Hug Refusal

It was the denial of affection heard ’round the world–or at least the few pockets of the globe that still pay attention to Jerry Seinfeld and Kesha (still reeling from her legal quagmire with Dr. Luke). In an exchange that personified awkwardness at David Lynch Foundation’s National Night of Laughter …

Gwyneth Paltrow Can’t Get the Goop Off of Her Now

From the very moment Goop was incepted by Gwyneth Paltrow in September of 2008, it was the most Gwyneth Paltrow thing she ever did. Steeped in pretension and nebulousness, Paltrow has recommended everything from conscious uncoupling (still worse than the Katy Perry/Orlando Bloom-coined “respectful, loving space“) to vaginal steaming. And …

Madonna, Met Ball 2017 & The Pertinence of the American Life Album Now More Than Ever

The Met Ball, while growing increasingly tired in the themes it chooses–this year’s being not so much a theme as a decision to honor Rei Kawakubo of Commes des Garçons–never disappoints when it comes to showcasing the boldest fashion choices of the moment. And while, yes, there were the usual Kardashian/Jenner …

Celebrity-Backed Scholarships & Beyoncé: A Testament To The Direness of Affording Higher Education in America

It’s a bit weird, you know, when a celebrity needs to get involved in causes outside of self-promotion, particularly education. But that’s precisely what Beyoncé has felt obliged to do in her post as World’s Greatest Woman with the newly announced Formation Scholars award for female students pursuing music, creative arts, …

Rachael Leigh Cook Leaves Behind the 90s, Acts As White Apologist for Kendall Jenner With Revamped “Your Brain On Drugs” Commercial

Rachael Leigh Cook’s epochal anti-drug commercial, released in 1997 (before her pinnacle role as Laney Boggs in 1999’s She’s All That), was telling of a moment toward the end of the decade that had burned out on the heroin chic aesthetic peddled by supermodels in fashion ads–Kate Moss obviously at the …

Drew Barrymore’s Party Girl Self Is Shuddering at Her Crocs Shill Self

Drew Barrymore comes from a long line of actors, most notably John Barrymore, her grandfather. And, in keeping with the actor’s replete-with-emotion psyche, the Barrymore line–John in particular–has always had a predilection for the drink. Cut to Drew in the mid-80s riding high on the child star success cultivated from …

The Mariah Carey/Bryan Tanaka Allowance Rumor Iterates A Larger Truth For Most Women: Yo Ass Gots to Pay for Monogamy

If you’re wondering what it takes to secure a boyfriend, to get some steady dick–in short, maintain an enduring relationship of any kind with a male–the answer in the twenty-first century has increasingly become: pay for it. Not in the prostitute way, however; or at least not as straightforwardly as …